Yet again, I'm writing about one of my childhood favs, I can't help it! I don't know if it's the quarantine that is making me nostalgic or if I never actually grew up (I'm leaning towards the latter). As you can probably tell by the title, I rewatched The Cheetah Girls.

To say that The Cheetah Girls was one of my favorite movies growing up would be an understatement. On a good day, you would have had a hard time convincing a 5-year-old Tierney that I wasn't a Cheetah Girl. I knew every word to every song, knew all the dance moves, and begged my mom for a cheetah print tracksuit! (I got pajamas instead, but they worked just as well!) What I didn't realize as a 5-years-old was how incredibly insane this movie was! (We still stan though!) Rewatching this movie as a 22-years-old was a different experience. I suddenly had so many concerns: 

 

 

Jackal Johnson

 

 

 

Towards the beginning of the film, we see the group auditioning for their school talent show. (Cinderella remains a bop, and I realize that this song is one of the many reasons I am a feminist today.) Out of nowhere Jackal Johnson slithers out of the shadows and tells the girls he wants to offer them a recording contract. First of all, why is this grown man just hanging around a high school? As a kid, I was always perturbed by Galleria's mom stepping in here. But now I'm glad she was there to pump the breaks on this whole situation. Does that mean I'm getting old?

Jackal continues to be the worst character in the film by dangling the idea of fame and fortune in front of the girls' faces then rips it away when he tells them that in order to sign with him that they can't actually be The Cheetah Girls. Garbage!

 

 

Galleria's Attitude 

 

 

 

 

Now this is a point that I was aware of at age 5. Galleria was never my favorite character. In fact,  I was acutely aware of the fact every time the group nearly broke up throughout the franchise it was always her fault. She was constantly bossing everyone around, acted as if she alone ran the group, and shamed Dorinda for lack of finances. Gotta love Raven, but Galleria needed some help!

 

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Toto Getting Lost

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Talk about the most anti-climactic climax in film history! Galleria's dog, Toto, gets stuck in a hole. Yes, you read that right a hole. In order to save him, the fire department has to cut the power causing a massive blackout in the city of Manhattan (I'm not sure what kind of hole this was, but apparently it was an important hole). A panicked Galleria ends up on the news explaining that her dog is causing the blackout, though anyone affected would not be able to see this broadcast. The Cheetah Girls spring into action and flee from all over the city to help save Toto. The girls reunite and their friendship is saved with a musical number.  

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What can I say? The threshold I had for a good movie at age 5 was much lower than that of today, but I still love a nostalgic experience. 

Sincerely, 

A Retired Cheetah Girl